The Sounds of Love, A to Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

It's 1985. 

You and your date have hidden in the mall til they shut the lights & locked the doors. You've creeped over to the arcade, dodging the security guards. Making out in the Sinistar booth-console is pretty cool but uncomfortable and the constant "Run, human, run!" screamed from the screen is way too jarring, so you both roll to the low-pile carpeted floor that smells of sneakers and orange soda. 

Suddenly one of the games comes on. Scares the crap out of the both of you so you haul up the pants and get out as more and more games fire themselves up. 

Ducking around a corner, you watch as the machines seemingly jabber at each other, one of which has somehow recorded your prelude to lust and is playing it back as several arcade-game themes play; a fight breaks out between consoles, lasts about ten minutes, and eventually classical music pops out of nowhere as the playback continues.

That kind of sums up this very odd LP, a 1972 offering from Yorkshire Records out of Pennsylvania.

The first three cuts are originals, whereas the originality cut out after the first two. 

That's not me being snarky, that's you downloading these and agreeing with me. 

STILL, wow, who put this out? The insane genius on the cover with a synthesizer and a willing female accomplice? Were they one and the same? No information given anywhere, except that a Liza Condon took the photos - three more black & white pics much like the cover on the reverse - and Warp Productions took the project on. 

I have a feeling that if one scoured the '72-'73 issues of Playboy or Penthouse, one would find small advertisements for this hidden in the back.

I gave a slightly harsher approval of this LP some time ago in another forum, but after a second listen I found that there is some sense of musicality to the original tracks, so I'd have to guess that the first time out I was under the influence of maybe a chemical or two or something.

Both Scented Wind and Black and Blues are rather simple tunes, the 'love' part of the equation coming from the sounds emanating from we're led to believe the woman on the record jacket. Whether or not she's actually with someone with a tape recorder right beside the bed or she's alone in a studio giving crazy lip service to the back of her hand I'll let you guys try to figure out.

I could be a complete bastard and tell everyone to crank the volume for Midnight Waterfalls, but I just don't have the heart. Maybe do it later for your unruly neighbors after a cautious listen. Imagine Lou Reed's Metal Machine Music on 78 rpm using a swatch of sandpaper instead of a stylus cartridge and I'd say it's getting close. 

The rest of the album is classical music, taken from somewhere but not actually played by whomever released this flawed gem, three tracks fed through the synth for some extremely mild tampering (I guess nuanced would be the term, but I couldn't swallow using it here) and the oozin' ahs laid over top once more.
Enjoy, but please listen to in an altered state.

Track listing:

Fred Miller - Scented Wind 5:20

A2 Fred Miller - Black & Blues 4:36

A3 Fred Miller - Midnight Waterfalls 9:30

A4 Maurice Ravel - Pavane 5:30

B1 Maurice Ravel - Bolero 14:00

B2 Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart - Piano Concerto No. 21 7:30 

Download here:
Lovezzzzzz...